Mummascribbles – A parents' worst fears – Mummascribbles

Today has been an emotional kind of day. I woke up to the news that the royal baby was on its way. I followed the news throughout the day, was overjoyed to hear that their precious daughter had been born and watched with delight when they left the hospital. I am not a royalist; I just love good old baby news and I just remember becoming a mum being the most wonderful feeling and so I love to think of people experiencing those feelings. Such happy baby news.

And then?

Then on the flip side there was the absolutely devastating news about Rio Ferdinand’s wife Rebecca passing away at the horrendously young age of 35, leaving behind three darling children.

And I cried. I shed a tear because it is among every parents worst fears to not be around to watch your children grow up. It has been my second biggest fear since giving birth to my boy, only overshadowed by the possibility of something happening to him.

I worry about it more than I should. I have horrible thoughts of something terrible happening to me and of him crying at night like he does now, only wanting his mummy. Thoughts of him not remembering who I am. Thoughts of me not seeing the man he grows into. It is a haunting, haunting thought.

I know a lot of people who lost their mum’s at terribly young ages and in these past couple of years, I have seen this disease bravely beaten by people I know, one a year older than me and one a year younger.

I watched this awful disease take Jade Goody away from her boys. But back then, whilst I felt sad that such a horrible thing had happened to a young mother, I didn’t cry. Because at that time, I couldn’t put myself in her position. But now I can. And Rebecca was just a couple of years older than me. It hits home a heck of a lot more now than it ever did before. Because as parents we have everything to live for. We have parents evenings to attend. School plays, football matches, dance classes – you name it, we are there to enjoy them and suddenly – just like that, there is one person missing. And it is just so sad.

And I know it happens every day. I am well aware that along with Rebecca, there are many other parents out there that this is happening to. Heck, right now, one of my wonderful blogging friends is dealing with the fact that her darling husband and father to her two very young children, has terminal cancer. And yes, every one of her posts about it make me sob.

Life is just so unfair. Cancer is just simply the most evil. And even though I didn’t know Rebecca; even though the news came in early this morning, I still tonight feel so terribly sad for her family, her beautiful children who have just lost their precious mum.

And all I could do today is make sure that I got lots of hugs and kisses from my boy. And all I can do in the future is pray that I am around to watch him grow up.

That is all we parents can do.

Tags: loss, fears, children, parents