Mummascribbles – Working mums – Real Mum Reviews – Mummascribbles

I have been a working mum for more than three years now and am currently at the start of my second maternity leave. Some days being at full time work for those three years was extremely difficult while on others it was nice to be able to sit and have a hot cup of tea without having to wipe a nose or change a bum! I know there are a heck of a lot of working mums out there, some who love it, some who hate it and others who are somewhere in the middle. I thought it would be interesting to see exactly how others feel about being a working mum and maybe we can all learn a little something about dealing with that dreaded mummy guilt!

Today we meet the lovely Lucy from Real Mum Reviews talking everything working mummy!

Tell me a little bit about who is in your family
I am Lucy, Mum to Erin, aged 3 and Neve, 5 months. I live with my other half and we are both in our mid thirties! 🙂

What age were your children when you returned to work?
I was lucky enough to have 13 months off on maternity leave the first time around, using holiday to increase the end of the 12 months. I therefore had 11 months at home with my daughter. I stupidly finished work 5 weeks early with my first pregnancy (and was then 2 weeks late!), which in hindsight wasn’t a good idea, as I would have loved to have had longer at the other end rather than being bored at the beginning!

I feel incredibly lucky to have been able to have such a long time off and I do not under estimate how blessed that makes me to have seen all those special firsts! I am lucky I have lots of support from my partner and family.

Did you return to a job away from the home or within the home?
I returned to work at my previous job as a HR Advisor based around 15 miles from home.

Did you choose to return or did your circumstances force you back? 
I wanted to go back to work, as I enjoy adult company, and have also worked very hard to qualify in my profession. I also have a very active mind, and found maternity leave quite hard at times, hence why I started the blog to keep my brain active. That said, financially I didn’t really have a choice either, we needed a second income to run our family home.

Did you return to work full or part time?
I am lucky enough to have returned to work part time, and again I know how lucky I am to have been given the flexibility, particularly as part time jobs in HR are like gold dust. I work three days a week – Monday, Wednesday, Thursday. We chose those days so that my work never waited more than 2 days before I return. At times I do have to pick up stuff on my days off, but this isn’t a problem and works well around my childcare and family commitments.

What childcare do you have in place and how did you go about choosing it?
My daughter goes to nursery 1.5 days a week, and she really enjoys it. I am also again lucky that I have very supportive grandparents who also have her another 2 days a week. I wanted my daughter to experience nursery as I felt this would be great for her development and social interaction. Technically I only needed her to go one day a week, but put her in for an extra half day as I felt this would benefit her in the long run and give her more time to mix with children of the same age, learn to share etc, and prepare her better for when she started school. She also loves the time with her Nanny and Grandad, and I still get one day in the week as special time together, and half a day to myself whilst she is at nursery. This is great for peaceful food shopping or housework!

I found choosing a childcare provider quite hard, although personal recommendations and ofstead reports were always helpful. I also went and viewed the nursery and asked a whole barrage of questions before making my decision. I have been really happy with my choice, and my daughter has made some wonderful friends.

What do you find the most difficult about being a working mum? 
When your child is ill, particularly when you work part time this can be challenging. Also when they are settling into a new nursery setting, those first few weeks can be heartbreaking if they cry when you leave them! For that reason, I started my daughter’s settling in sessions earlier than I needed to, I didn’t want to be blubbing in the office like an emotional wreck, and obviously it didn’t take her long to get used to the change in routine. At times I miss my daughter tredmendously, and wish I could be at home with her instead, but I do find the days we do have together all the more special. When she was younger, and went to bed at 7, it was very hard only seeing her for 30 minutes before bedtime, but now she is 3 we get a little longer to chat and have a catch up about her day before bed. I love those moments – so precious! 🙂

How do you deal with the working mummy guilt?
Working mummy guilt can be a killer, but I like the fact that my daughter knows mummy works and that I do it so that I can give her and our family the nice things she likes. She tells me that she misses me but she is chuffed to bits when I get home. At the end of the day, I work to live and not live to work, and I don’t beat myself up about that. I am confident that returning to work was the right decision for me, particularly as I have the best of both worlds working part time.

How did you feel when it was time to go back to work?
Despite having been off for so long, I felt very anxious about returning to work. The biggest challenge for me was that I was still breast feeding and struggled to get Erin on a bottle, which made those first few  weeks all the more traumatic. I was very emotional transitioning her to nursery and I felt a little lost without a baby attached to my hip! On a personal level, I struggled with confidence having been out of the workplace for so long and felt a bit like I had lost my touch – it took a while to get that back. This maternity leave, I am hoping to do more keeping in touch days with my employer to try and ensure I stay more in the loop. In a fast changing industry this is even more important.

Is your work/life balance what you want it to be or would you rather work less or more?
I am really pleased with my work life balance, and I am happy with the days I work. when I return after my second child I wouldn’t be averse to working more hours, and eventually when both are at school I would be happy to work full time again, as I feel this would be beneficial for our family and increase our household income.

What advice would you give to a mummy heading back to work? 
It is never as bad in reality as it feels in the weeks approaching the D day!! As hard as leaving your baby can be, it is actually good for them to learn about life, mix with other children, and get used to different routines other than the one they are used to. You will get to watch them blossom and bloom, and enjoy those special moments together, and because you aren’t with them every day, you will appreciate them even more. Also, enjoy having some adult time back, something for yourself – you deserve it! 🙂

Lucy, thank you so much for taking part! It sounds like despite the initial anxieties (which I think everyone has!), you have found going back to work really good for you. It’s lovely that Erin has got to spend regular time at both nursery and with her grandparents – exactly the same set up as me before I went on maternity. I hope you are enjoying your leave and huge congrats on baby Erin entering the world!

Along with her blog www.realmumreview.com, you can also find Lucy over on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Youtube.