Today is a sad day – Mummascribbles

I’m writing this with big puffy eyes. I’m emotionally drained and incredibly sad, for today I had to say goodbye my darling cat. 

I wrote about how poorly she was here and over the last couple of weeks she has deteriorated lots with a massive fluid build up along with a struggle to breathe. Today I took her to the vets where they immediately told me to take her to the animal hospital where she was being treated. Of course, nothing ever goes easily and seconds after leaving, a nice person driving in the car next to me signalled that I’d got a flat tyre. Great! Luckily we have a kwik fit at the end of our road which we were passing and so I swung by and the other half took Zach home while I waited with Millie for the tyre to be fixed (it had a screw in it!). 

Once it was sorted we headed off to the hospital, just me and moo cat because it was far too late to be dragging Zach there. 

Upon arriving, they whisked moo off to be checked over and came back out to tell me that she was in an oxygen cage. They then checked her over some more and it was time for the talk with the vet. He told me that she was very poorly and that the fluid had reached her chest, hence the breathing difficulties. They had drained her to make her more comfortable but that now was the time to decide what to do. He said that of course they could try her on different medication but that she was in a very bad way and there was no saying anything would work. That, as it stood, if I did decide to put her to sleep it would be the time that I’d chosen rather than leaving it too late and her ending up really sick. I knew that I had to be kind to her and felt that he was thinking along the same lines which made it easier. And so, I decided to do the right thing and put her to sleep. Yes, I wanted the nighttime cuddles to continue but that wasn’t fair on her. This was absolutely the right decision to make. 

And so, the lovely vet took me to a quiet private room where I had my last moments with my little lady. When he brought her in, I knew I’d made the right decision. She was still having so much trouble breathing and the look on her face said help me. 

For the next half an hour I cuddled her.

I kissed her.

I tickled her under her chin (her favourite place!)

I told her what a wonderful cat she had been and that we would all miss her so very much. 

And then the vet came back and it was time. He asked me if I wanted to stay with her but I couldn’t do it. Had I not have been alone I may have but I just couldn’t. He told me he couldn’t if it was his which made me feel better. He took me back to the waiting area as he’d need to bring her box back to me.

Which he did a short time later.

She was gone. 

She was peaceful and happy and I was happy that she was no longer suffering. 

And now?

She’s in a world where she can hunt for mice…

Where she can sleep in random positions again…

Where she can jump on top of wardrobes…

And generally get herself into a pickle!

She really was a wonderful cat. My buddy for six years. She used to sleep in my bed, wake me up by nuzzling my face and chase bits of pasta around the floor. She’ll always be my Millie moo, my moo cat, my mousecat!

I’ll love her forever.

Sleep tight darling kitty.