Why 'waiting until they are ready', is the best bit of advice for toilet training – Mummascribbles

I know it myself – it happened with Zach. I tried him at the age of 2.5 but he just wasn’t interested. Fast forward six months and just before he turned 3, he did it all by himself. I don’t remember his toilet training because he just did it. It took him a bit longer (almost 4) by the time he was dry at night, but I know that is a hormonal thing so didn’t matter.

So knowing that waiting is the key to success, why when it came to Oscar, did I start worrying?

Well, it was because he took even longer. I always thought he would do it sooner, having watched Zach and always wanting to be like his big bro. Every time he showed interest, out came the potty and we had some successful wees, but then he realised it was something I wanted him to do. I would keep checking in with him if he needed the loo, and then he would get fed up and leave it and wet himself. So back into pull ups he went and Mumma gave up. This happened over several months and at one point I put a post up on Facebook asking how on earth I could get him toilet trained. He had gone past Zach’s age of 3 and I started really worrying that he was going to be going to school next year and still not be toilet trained. The answers I got from that Facebook post was what I already knew. Stop trying and wait for it to happen by itself. Just wait until he is ready. Of course I instantly knew this was the right information. I had already been through this once before.

The thing I have probably found most frustrating is that he started being dry at night before the day! He would wake up with a dry pull up and immediately pee in it. I was literally screaming inside! Gradually, we started the process of him doing a morning wee and a bedtime wee. It was hit and miss. Sometimes he did and sometimes he didn’t. But anything was better than nothing.

Then a few weeks ago he got ill. He had an awful cough (which he kindly passed onto me) and because of the Coronavirus rules, we had to stay at home. We were both self isolating for two weeks and it was this time when finally the toileting happened! He just started telling me he needed a wee. There was the odd forget – the odd wee in his pull up, but he was finally excited about trying to keep his pull up dry all day. And he did really well. After a couple of weeks, I had said that if he continued to keep a dry nappy, he could be upgraded to pants – and he did it and was the proudest boy when he kept his pants dry all day!

It came with a worry though. Whilst he had conquered the wees, he had not done a poo – and he had never managed to do a poo on the toilet. He had sat there knowing that he needed to go, but just couldn’t get it out sitting down – he just had to stand up. So I had no idea how this part was going to go.

I saw his face. The face I recognise as his poo face. I dashed him off to the toilet and waited for him to tell me that he couldn’t do it – except he did do it, and boy was he proud of himself. He then went off to carry on what he was doing and then was struck again with the need to poo (he takes ages to poo that one, very much like his Father!), and back we went to the toilet and again he went. I was so chuffed. And that was the only day I have had to read the signs. After that, after he realised that actually he can do a poo on the toilet, he has told me when he needs to go. All wees and all poos have been on the toilet.

I cannot believe how quickly he has done it all and I cannot believe how easy it has been. He has even upgraded himself from sitting down for wees, to standing up like his Big Bro and Daddy! He has been in pants for days now and he is still only in pull ups at night in case he accidentally wees. But so far so good, and as we are coming to the end of the pull ups, I won’t be buying anymore (but will keep a couple spare just in case!). He keeps telling me what a big boy he is, about how many poos he has done, and about how he can stand up just like Daddy!

I may have worried. I may have thought he was doing it all too late. He may not have done it as soon as his brother did. But there is no doubt that I am glad I waited until he was ready. It has been such an easy process and I am so proud of how well he has done 🙂